Every so often, I get a familiar panic regarding my health. I feel like a small muscle ache or an over exhausted day are omens for my impending doom. I know it’s a silly feeling, but I can’t help these invasive thoughts, only combat them.
I suppose they make sense considering I once had a variant of life-threatening cancer…
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When I was diagnosed with Leukemia at age 18, my perspective on life was forever altered. I looked at this gift we’re granted with a newfound exuberance. Yet, this insidious hypochondria simultaneously implanted itself in my mind like a parasitic organism. When I was happy, it laid dormant, and when I was worried or depressed, it fed, growing to unruly levels.
So, while continuing my Whole60 run, I had another series of worries that coincided with my internal clock ringing its yearly check-up alert. Where’s the snooze button?
I have had these two sore spots, like under-the-skin bruises in my muscles, and they feel like somewhat recent lesions, even though it’s been eight months. Now, the very distance of the commencement tells me that it’s not Leukemia again, and I’ll likely be fine, but will this ever go away? There is no visual sign of a bruise, only the feeling under the surface.
Then, I had been feeling rather exhausted lately. Sure, I work twelve to seventeen hour days, but I’m used to that. Why am I tired now? I worry about these things– far removed from my diet, mind you –and I fear the worst every time.
I’ll make an appointment with my shitty Primary Care Provider, and get some blood work done; that’ll satiate me until I feel some “ailments” again.
Let’s get back to talking about the Whole60!
-April 25th — 209.2 lbs.
-May 2nd — 206.4 lbs.
-Tuesday, May 8th: 202.6 lbs.
-Wednesday, May 16th: 199.2
-Wednesday, May 23rd: 199.6.
-Tuesday, May 29th: 198.6.
Slow and steady wins the race, except that this race is about how I feel and not how much I weigh. Remember, this diet enables you to live the life you’ve always wanted: full of energy and feeling incredibly healthy. Just don’t get a bout of anxiety along the way.
My First Whole30 below: